When it comes to planning a wedding, we all look for tips and advice anywhere we can find it. For some, this means “pinning” anything and everything we see on Pinterest and creating our very own dream wedding board. For others however, this means turning to the people we trust most: our friends and family. But what if one of the people you are sharing your thoughts and ideas with is actually getting married as well and you begin to notice that her wedding ideas are very similar to the ones you’ve expressed previously?
Believe it or not, many women find themselves in situations where a friend has become quite the copycat wedding planner, and that can sting a little. Anyone who has ever needed to plan a wedding will tell you that the experience can be very stressful. You plan for months and months and put everything you have into personalizing your wedding to fit both your personality and your groom’s personality. Now what?
Well before you get too upset and end up saying something to your copycat that you may regret, look at things objectively; when you live in the same city and have the same friends, sometimes it’s not the fact that she’s taking your ideas, it’s just that this is what she’s always dreamed of as well and sometimes things overlap, unfortunately. However, if you’ve known each other for years and all of the decisions your copycat has made about her own wedding don’t really seem to reflect her personality or anything that you would ever picture for her wedding, there may be something else at play here.
According to relationship expert, Melanie Ross Mills, some women are just too afraid to break away from the norm of what everyone else is doing. “We’re fearful of stepping out and doing what we’d really like to do because we’re afraid it won’t be accepted or approved of.” Say your copycat friend has always said she’d want a black and purple theme at her wedding, but all of a sudden because you’ve expressed that you’d like to go with a champagne off-white theme and everyone else loved that idea, that’s now what she wants.
So instead of getting frustrated and losing friendships over this incident, maybe now is a good time to sit with your friend and ask her how she really pictures her dream wedding. It’s possible, and even likely, that she doesn’t even realize what she’s doing by copying you. By talking things through with her, you may be able to snap her back to reality and allow yourselves to both have your perfect, different weddings.